I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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