I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
