I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Randomize
