hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
