She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
