You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
