don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
