Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
