don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize