wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
