I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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