He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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