i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
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