So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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