I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
