The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
