How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Randomize
