how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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