please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
