FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize