Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I want a musical about memes.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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