That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
