did you get engaged???
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
