rhymes with "ouble enetration"
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
