I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
