i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Are my feet made of real feet?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
