i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
