so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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