I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
