i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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