Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize