had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize