Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Someone came in the potted fern
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Randomize
