Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
