pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
it's like iHOP with fire
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize