david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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