we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
