38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Can I color on your dick again?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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