Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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