so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
