Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
