It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
