Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
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