Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize