he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize