let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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