Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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