Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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