the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
