After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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